Pickleball Singles Mingle
February 14, 2025
In tennis, love means a score of zero. In the meetup group called Pickleball Singles Mingle!, love, sometimes, means love.
Pickleball Singles Mingle! is a group of singles who love pickleball. In less than three years 16,600 members have joined PSM. Some have fallen in love with each other. Some have gotten married.
Sue Tarkin and Peter Beckel got married six months after meeting through the group Pickleball Singles Mingle!
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Sue Tarkin and Peter Beckel of Niceville, Florida, met through the group in January 2023 (Sue says Niceville, “Really is a nice place to live!”). Sue is a former court reporter who now volunteers for several organizations. The 73-year-old native of Hamilton, Ohio, had been widowed and says she decided to join Pickleball Singles Mingle! because, “It sounded fun to meet more single people who played pickleball. It is a way to meet active people in a healthy, safe environment.”
Peter, 65, has been divorced for 25 years. The former Minnesota resident says he’s “done a little bit of everything, from salesman, to teacher, to septic system installation,” and now is an options trader, volunteer and, yes, pickleball player.
“This is a great group of pickleballers who want to have fun,” Peter says. “We are older and we all have baggage from previous relationships, but while playing pickleball you are gentle and kind to individuals who are weaker than you, many times helping them improve.”
Six months after they met, Sue and Peter not only improved, they got married.
Pickleball Singles Mingle! has branched out to hold other events besides pickleball tournaments. Tobi Meyer, 52, and Gavin Mason, 61, of The Villages, Florida, got to know each other when they were among 11 group members who went on a hiking trip to Utah two years ago.
Tobi says, “I wouldn’t say it was love at first sight, but I knew Gavin was for me on our hike to Zion National Park on day two or three of our trip.”
Tobi, an Illinois native, is a loan officer for a bank and had previously tried online dating. “It was not a pleasant experience. I tried it on and off for years and never made a meaningful connection,”
Tobi has been with Pickleball Singles Mingle! since its inception. She’s also a really good pickleball player, with a 4.5 DUPR (Dynamic Universal Pickleball Rating).
Gavin, who’s an IT project manager, says, “I like to meet people who are active.” Gavin is a 3.5 player and the couple acknowledges that Tobi is better and more into pickleball. She plays six days a week, he plays three or four days. And they’re perfectly fine with that. “When she’s doing pickleball, I’ll do other things,” Gavin says.
Five months after meeting, Tobi moved into Gavin’s home. They are now shopping for an engagement ring.
Pickleball Singles Mingle! was started in May 2022 by Karen Butera, a retired corporate attorney who lives in Orlando. “We were just coming out of COVID and us single pickleball players had been very isolated through the process,” Karen says. “We wanted to connect in person with other single pickleball people. Single people who share the love and passion for pickleball. There was no mechanism for doing so other than bumping into someone at your local courts. And that’s how Pickleball Singles Mingle! started.”
The group goes on several trips a year and recently had 25 members aboard a Caribbean cruise. “It’s the amazing in-person connections that make it a success,” Karen says. “PSM isn’t just for dating, it’s for finding ‘your people’. New deep friendships of all genders, that have deep roots, and are grounded in the common love of pickleball. We are a fun, all inclusive group. You won’t believe how much fun you’ll have at one of our events.”
Karen says any single who wants to join PSM should go to the group’s Facebook page and answer the simple questions. “In order to join, you have to play pickleball, not even well, not be a pro, just play. And be single, not in a committed relationship.”
Peter Beckel, who met his wife Sue Tarkin through the group, says, “The worst that can happen is you might not meet someone you want to spend the rest of your life with…but you may. You will also meet some wonderful people from around the country who have the same likes, dislikes, goals and dreams as yours.”
Happy Valentine’s Day.
My thoughts of the week, not all pickleball
· Yes, the Chiefs were the beneficiaries of some bad calls in the AFC Championship game vs. Buffalo. However, to all the conspiracy theorists who said the NFL wanted Kansas City to three-peat, what do you say after the butt-whipping Philly gave KC in the Super Bowl?
· Ben Johns gave me a candid, thoughtful interview for the cover story of the current issue of Pickleball Magazine. Because pickleball’s most awarded player has been profiled a million times, we focused on his life off the court, his interests, investments, his girlfriend and hobbies. Johns mentioned that he has an addiction to Goldfish crackers. We met up last Friday at the Tucson PPA tournament, I gave him a bag of the stuff. I wish I got his reaction on camera but he got a kick out of it. You can read the magazine interview here. In the same issue I wrote about the next big thing in pickleball, which is the explosion in the number of indoor pickleball clubs having opened recently, with hundreds more planned to open.
· If you’re interested in great writers and reporters, the biography Jimmy Breslin, The Man Who Told The Truth, by Richard Esposito, is a terrific read about the legendary New York City newspaper columnist and author.
· The Jewish Community Center of Staten Island is hosting a pickleball tournament on March 2nd as a fundraiser for Sunrise Day Camp. According to Rosie Klein, a longtime camp advocate and pickleball enthusiast, it’s the only full summer day camp in the world for children with cancer and their siblings that is offered completely free of charge. Every donation will help support families who are going through a tough time emotionally and financially. For more information and if you would like to be a sponsor or donate to this wonderful cause, visit sijcc.networkforgood.com.
· Spring training is underway, and if you’re a baseball nut like me, you’re studying your team’s roster, reading about its outlook and can’t wait until Opening Day.
Remember, if you buy any Hudef paddle that costs $169.99, use my discount code MS30 to knock down the price by 30%, to $119.99. Any less expensive paddle, the code is MS15, giving you 15% off.